What if it’s worse?
It was an impulse buy.
I was getting my winter tires swapped out, and the tech asked me…
“How are your windshield wipers doing?”
Well, now that you mention it…it was probably time to replace them. And with the convenience of them doing it for me, while I was already there? Sold.
Unfortunately, things didn’t go as I had hoped. It rained the next night as I was driving home from my silversmithing class, and my new blades were badly streaking, especially on the driver’s side.
My old wiper blades would have been better. Much better.
What I had hoped would be better, a good choice, didn’t work out as expected.
Have you ever feared this would happen to you?
I talk with clients all the time who have this fear…that a change they want to make, a job they want to go after, a project they want to sign up for, may not work out.
That what comes next just might be worse than they have right now, even if things now aren’t great.
A new company culture might be worse.
The new job may be more stressful.
The new house may have more maintenance issues.
It’s so easy to make up stories about what the future will look like.
Have you ever done that?
What if, and I know this may sound crazy, but what if the future might actually be better?
The new company culture might be empowering.
The new job might be more rewarding.
The new house might be a better place to enjoy what matters most.
If we’re going to make up stories, what if we make up better stories?
If you find yourself facing a possible or likely change, here are a few things you can do to shift your narrative and tell yourself a better story:
What other possible outcomes are there?
The first step in shifting the story is to consider what other narratives might be possible. Spend some time imagining all sorts of possibilities, no matter how far fetched they seem right now.
Maybe your company is getting acquired. Have you considered how this change might bring new opportunities for your professional growth? Perhaps you’re worried that your partner’s new zeal for all things vegan means you will never enjoy a juicy steak again. Have you considered the new culinary delights you’ll be able to experience?
How likely is this imagined future?
It’s easy to fixate on the worst case scenario, especially when we’re surrounded by fear and uncertainty. Taking a step back to reflect on what’s actually likely to happen can help us refocus our thoughts.
Perhaps you’re worried about your future with your organization if your project doesn’t launch on time. What’s more likely - that you’ll be fired or that there will be some tough conversations and a new launch plan? Maybe you’re worried your flight delay means you’ll miss your vacation. What’s more likely - that you’ll miss your vacation completely, or that you’ll have a wonderful time, regardless of when you arrive?
If things don’t quite work out, how will you adapt?
Often, what’s even more helpful is imagining how you will adapt and make right any situation you face, even if things don’t go according to plan. If your fears manifest, how will you adapt to still achieve a positive outcome?
Maybe you’re worried you won’t find a job as quickly as you had planned. If that happens, how will you adapt to get the income you need, tell the story about the gap in your resume, or take advantage of the additional time off? Perhaps you’re worried the lifestyle changes won’t be enough to turnaround your health. If they’re not enough, how will you pivot to try more changes or get more support from a health provider?
It’s so easy to tell ourselves the story that what’s coming next will be worse than what we have now. But we have control over the stories we tell ourselves, and how we embrace what comes ahead. When we consider multiple future alternatives, evaluate how likely the bad ones are to actually happen, and imagine ourselves adapting to deal with whatever comes our way, we can have a stronger narrative and feel more empowered about our future.
What story are you telling yourself?
Finding yourself needing a little help to take control of your own narrative?
Let’s talk. Book time, and we’ll figure out how to get you unstuck and get going.
How will you iterate towards the person you’re becoming?
May 15, 2025
About the author:
Christina Von Stroh is a leadership coach who helps her clients become wildly successful by applying iterative software development practices to achieve their dreams. Want to work with Christina to help you iterate towards the person you’re becoming?
Book your free strategy session.
