I recently had a conversation with a leader I admire greatly.
One of those rare leaders who not only talks about aligning the team with a corporate mission and empowering staff to leverage their unique skills and talents to achieve great things, but one who is ACTUALLY ABLE TO MAKE IT HAPPEN.
I asked this leader how he became that kind of leader, and do you know where he started?
He began by sharing his own past...the hard lessons he learned about himself and the impact his previous style of leadership had on those around him.
That’s an interesting place to start, right?
Instead of citing a methodology that worked, or a leader who inspired him, the impact empowering others had on his success, he focused on his own internal growth.
Last month, a hand-selected cohort of 20 established and emerging leaders explored themes in service of cultivating alignment and agency in themselves and those they lead as part of the Forward Action Leadership Lab (FALL).
Our first theme?
Leading ourselves first, specifically around our own mental state.
And you know what?
The leaders in the FALL program came to the same conclusion as the leader I admire.
When they were AWARE of their own state, their own tendencies, their own mindset, they also realized that they had AGENCY to choose how they were showing up.
When they CHOOSE to show up above the line, to create the support they needed to show up from a place of curiosity and openness, they created better solutions, stronger relationships, and experienced more personal alignment while doing so.
When they IGNORED their inner wisdom, deprioritized taking care of themselves, avoided the areas where they knew they needed to focus, it all came out sideways and they failed to make the progress they hoped.
Focusing on who we are and how we’re showing up isn’t selfish. And it’s not optional.
It’s absolutely imperative if we want to be leaders who make a lasting impact, who get things done, who bring out the best in others.
Are you skipping this step?
November 12, 2026
About the author:
Christina Von Stroh is a leadership coach who helps her clients become wildly successful by applying iterative software development practices to achieve their dreams. Want to work with Christina to help you iterate towards the person you’re becoming?
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