I don’t like that intersection
I still don’t like that intersection.
While turning left at a green light one night on my way home from a family gathering, I was hit by a teenage driver running a red. Everyone was fine, thankfully, but my car was totaled.
For weeks, I felt my anxiety rise while high while driving, especially when I went through that intersection. It was on a route I traveled multiple times a week, so the anxiety came up frequently. It was strongest when I was making that same left turn, but even when I approached the intersection from a different direction, I could feel it rise up.
I needed to get that anxiety under control.
Has this ever happened to you?
I found that there were a few things that helped.
The repetition of going through that intersection again and again gave me confidence that the accident was a one-time incident, while sometimes choosing a different route gave me a sense of control, so I picked my route with intention. I even named my car (Cranberry, as she’s red and purchased right before Christmas), to give me something fun to think about every time I got behind the wheel. I knew Cranberry would keep me safe.
We all run into situations that give us anxiety. If they’re causing significant interference in our daily life or due to a medical condition, seeking the help of a trained professional is important. Even if our anxiety is mild, it can be empowering to find ways to manage it, so it doesn’t take over.
Whether you feel that anxiety rise when you’re getting ready to make a pitch to a big prospective client, prepare for a crucial conversation, or go on a trip, these three tips might help make things a bit easier:
Name it
Anxiety often comes as a way to keep us safe. Identifying what threat we’re really worried about and the likelihood of it happening can help us decide how to manage it.
Perhaps you’re nervous about a big launch. Is it because of a specific experience in your past or because you’re not confident with the product? Maybe you’re feeling unsettled headed into an important conversation. Is it because there’s tension in the relationship or because a similar conversation with someone else went poorly?
Find some control
When we identify and lean into the things we can control, it can give us a greater confidence in facing the things we can’t.
Maybe you’re uncomfortable every time your senior leader joins a team meeting. What can you do to feel better prepared about what they might want to discuss? Perhaps you’re nervous about moving to a new city. What can you work out ahead of time, to reduce the unknowns?
Get some reps in
Often, our anxiety diminishes the more times we practice doing the thing that makes us anxious.
Perhaps you get anxious at the idea of public speaking. How can you get more practice presenting, so that it’s less overwhelming? Maybe it’s the idea of getting on an airplane that makes you sweat. Can you get more experience flying, so it becomes more comfortable?
Feeling anxious is normal, it’s often our body’s way of keeping us safe from situations that may cause us harm. But when we let normal anxiety get in our way, we often lose out on great experiences.
When we feel anxious, naming it, identifying what’s within our control, and finding ways to get more exposure to and experience with the situation that causes our anxiety, can help keep it manageable so that we can achieve our dreams.
What are you anxious about?
As you read this, are you finding yourself ready for a little help?
You’re here. You want to be there. I can help.
Let’s talk. Book time, and we’ll figure out how to get you unstuck and get going.
How will you iterate towards the person you’re becoming?
June 5, 2025
About the author:
Christina Von Stroh is a leadership coach who helps her clients become wildly successful by applying iterative software development practices to achieve their dreams. Want to work with Christina to help you iterate towards the person you’re becoming?
Book your free strategy session.
